Change of Perspective

My legs hurt while driving to Redmond. I knew it was the start of a yet another tiring day. One part of me even thought that it was pointless to make so much effort to go because I wouldn’t be able to sit peacefully and attend the class anyway. How I wished to be able to listen to the teacher explain tafseer or to recite to her the surah I had memorized without having to distract my daughter countless times. I was also already getting stressed out about the hectic day after returning home. Tears started rolling down my eyes. Why is it all so difficult?

Suddenly my heart whispered to me to have a change in perspective. Allah SWT was giving me an opportunity to attend a gathering of His Remembrance, despite being a mom to a toddler. So many young mothers do not have the support or resources to even step out of the house independently. I also got reminded of another young woman who regularly attended the Quran circle. She looks my age and comes without children. She loves to interact with my daughter. May be she is wishing so hard in her heart to have a child of her own, just like I did two years ago. For so long I had wished for a daughter in order to fill the emptiness inside my heart. How could I forget how Allah SWT had Blessed me immensely.

So I decided to go to the Quran circle with a happy and brave heart. I wanted to contribute to my parents having a crown on the Day of Judgment because of however Quran I could memorize. I wanted them to be seated on thrones, enjoying the fruits of upbringing five daughters with utmost love, care and effort, when this temporary world could only comment on how they do not have a son. I also wanted my daughter to absorb the positive energy and love for Quran from that gathering. So that is what I would try to focus on whenever someone asks me again: “Aap itni duur Seattle se ayi hain? Hum tu Redmond mein hi rehtay hain… [You have come from Seattle? That’s so far. We live nearby in Redmond]”