Gratitude in Pain

I was in pain. It was a pain that was invisible to everyone around me, yet it was something I had been battling with since a long time. There’s something unique about the pain that does not show. Even those closest to oneself do not understand the intensity of the pain, and so it’s only oneself, the pain, and Allah SWT. It’s an opportunity to increase in our relationship with Allah SWT, but at the same time, it’s difficult to not have external validation.

Suddenly my daughter’s face caught my attention. I looked carefully at her beautiful, innocent eyes, her pink lips, her complete, perfectly formed body, with a pure heart, a heart on fitrah, beating inside her. Suddenly, I felt immense gratitude. Despite the gratitude, I was still in pain. There is no denying of the pain. Nonetheless, I did realize that while in pain, it can help to shift one’s focus. When we focus on the innumerable blessings of Allah SWT, the blessings that He has specifically gifted us with, it becomes easier to deal with the pain. Not only that, whatever we focus on, grows, as is Allah SWT’s Promise: “If you are grateful, I will surely increase you”. Therefore, gratitude itself is a blessing of Allah SWT. I reminded myself to stay with this feeling, and it helped merge my pain with the sweetness of imaan.

Allah SWT Mentions in Quran that children are “gifts” by Allah SWT. He Chooses to Bless every person with this gift, or not, and in a way that is best for him/her according to Allah’s infinite Wisdom. Although the entire journey, which starts from wanting to have a child, till the end of parenting, can be excruciatingly challenging, and at times, painful, it helps to remember that it is a gift that Allah SWT Blesses us with, in the most perfect manner, at the most perfect time, and our task is to nurture the gift once we receive it, to the best of our ability.